News
Google News: Mouse infestation at Leicester cash and carry
[This is Leicestershire] - "I found mouse droppings under, around and on top of packets of monkey nuts and under bags of butter toast." Ms Clements said Mr Betts then called her over to another shelving unit and showed her "a gnawed packet of glutinous flour".
Guardian: Bafta TV special: Zawe Ashton, Alfie Allen, Vic and Bob
[The Guardian] - Last night I had a bar of butterscotch chocolate, some monkey nuts, prawn crisps and stilton on crackers. And some lager." "I had celery, hummus, goat's cheese, Snack a Jacks and a pint of orange squash. I feel naked without snacks," adds Vic.
Boris Johnson sued by insulted Orang-Utans!
www.thespoof.com
[The Spoof (satire)] - Johnson has apologised to our next of kin and has promised to release all Orang-Utans being kept in London Zoo and a years supply of monkey nuts as compensation; they told him to stuff his nuts up his baboon butt! Make Jaggedone's day - give this story
Artrocker is recruiting Liverpool & Manchester based writers!
www.artrocker.tv
[Artrocker] - Do you live in one of the aforementioned cities, love rock and roll and don't mind writing in exchange for free gig tickets, promos and monkey nuts? Then step this way! Artrocker is seeking to expand its writers base to include aspiring journalists
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